Is the guilt ingrained?

For the best part of two weeks now, I have been incredibly horny.  Not a little horny, not a lot horny, incredibly horny.  I have had sex dreams most nights for over two weeks, I can’t control myself around my wife,  I can’t stop thinking naughty thoughts or plotting naughty scenes for various half-written stories.  I want to orgasm, I want to make my wife orgasm, then I want to do it all over again.

Not something I should be complaining about, right?  Well try and tell my brain that.  I felt a bit (mentally) off most of yesterday and last night ended up close to tears because I felt so damn guilty for being so bloody horny all the time.  I preach about women embracing their sexuality, about allowing themselves to be the sexual beings they want to be, I complain about the double standards when it comes to men and women and sex; yet there I was last night, apologising to my wife for being ‘too horny‘. Continue reading

It’s just a little crush

The past few weeks we have been going to a certain place in town, for a certain service… their prices are cheap and they do a great job (and no, it’s not a naughty place!!!!! I’m just too paranoid about someone from ‘real life’ reading this and knowing what and who I’m talking of!).

I have a problem though, whenever I think about going back there I feel intensely guilty and can’t look my wife in the eye.  Why?  It just so happens that one of the guys that works there is rather easy on the eye – on my eye(s) – and I suppose you could say I have a little bit of a crush on him. Continue reading

Sex & depression – why I feel abnormal

I knew I needed to go on anti-depressants about 18 months before I finally took the leap (well, had the breakdown) and went to the doctor (well, was dragged to the doctor) to finally ask for help.  I hate to admit it but one of the reasons I was reluctant to go on anti-depressants was due to fear they would have a bad impact on my libido.  My wife and I have always enjoyed an active sex life and I didn’t want that to disappear; I didn’t want to go from wanting sex numerous times a week to having sex once a month because I felt guilty for not wanting it AT ALL. Continue reading

Why women should masturbate – and be proud of it!

I remember the very first time I had an orgasm.  It was Boxing Day, I was in my bedroom reading the book ‘Spring Collection’ by Judith Krantz.  I came across a sex scene and the next thing I knew I was touching myself in a way that felt wrong, but ohhhhh so good.  I must have been 13 and felt very conflicted about what I had done.

I had heard about masturbation before, well mostly about guys ‘wanking off’, a term that would make me giggle and screw my face up… it was yet another gross thing boys did.  From memory I told myself it was a one-off, that I wouldn’t do it again.  A few nights later I was nearing the end of the book and remembered that scene and what it had made me feel, what it had made me do to myself.  I told myself not to flick back – but I did – and as I had done on Boxing Day, touched myself until I had what I was pretty certain was an orgasm.  I felt ashamed but at the same time… relieved… and so relaxed that I quickly fell asleep. Continue reading